I had a really interesting moment with one of my students last week. See, I have this student Kiheem in my English 1 class and on my SPED caseload. Kiheem started coming to tutoring with me everyday after school as his community service for truancy court. I was surprised that he chose me because at that time I didn’t think we particularly liked each other. Case In Point: one of the first days Kiheem was in my class he told me he didn’t have to do what I told him; we ended up yelling at each other and I had him removed. Another time he told a student (in front of me) that we don’t do work in my class. (I later found out he meant that what we do in my class doesn’t always seem like work. Big Difference!) As you can see my relationship with Kiheem used to be pretty tumultuous.
These days things are different. Kiheem still isn’t one of my best students academically, but that okay because he’s even when he doesn’t do his Do Now he’s still one of my favorite people that I’ve ever known. He makes me feel like a proud big sister, or something along those lines.
In order to properly illustrate the effect I’ve had on Kiheem I am going to write a conversation we had in dramatic form:
Kiheem: Lawson, lemme stay in your room 6th period. I don’t wanna go to Kruger’s class.
Lawson: Why?
Kiheem: His class is ass. He be yellin’ all the time.
Lawson: I don’t know about that.
Kiheem: C’mon! You know I don’t try to start nothing with teachers.
Lawson: What?! Remember when we first met? We were screaming at each other!
Kiheem: Oh yeah! I forgot about that.
Lawson: Well, we just got mat at each other because we’re a lot alike: stubborn and hard-headed. Mr. Kruger’s a good guy, so that’s probably what’s going on with you two too.
Kiheem: I dunno, Lawson.
Lawson: Alright, Kiheem. You can stay in here today, but at the end of my class I’m making you figure out some ways that you can get along with Kruger.
Kiheem agreed to this, and for about 10 minutes sat quietly in the back of my room watching me. I would say he was watching me teach, but I don’t really think that’s what it was. I could tell that he was thinking about me, and about how differently he sees me now compared to how he saw me then. I know this because it’s easy to figure out when someone’s looking at you and thinking about how much they love you and how much you mean to them. Anyway, after that Kiheem walked up to me and asked me for a pass to go to Kruger’s class. And that’s how I know I’ve made a difference with him: I got him to be open to giving someone a second chance.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Friday, March 5, 2010
I'm really upset. I'm most likely not going to be teaching at Vaux next year, which is not what I had planned. Mastery Charter is already planning a takeover, and I can't work at charter schools.
I'm worried for my students. The majority of my kids will be kicked out of a charter school within a month and dumped into another overpopulated high school where the class sizes already break 30. Nobody is planning to change Vaux for them; they are changing the school to get grant money, because the project towers are coming down, and because there's money to be made in taking over schools.
This is hard to deal with. My life revolves around my students and to everyone "higher up" than me acts like that's not enough. It's not enough to love my kids, to create a safe environment for them, encourage them, advocate for them, and actually make them learn for ONCE in their lives. It's depressing.
I can see myself having to stand aside and watch as my beautiful, precious students are left behind.
I'm worried for my students. The majority of my kids will be kicked out of a charter school within a month and dumped into another overpopulated high school where the class sizes already break 30. Nobody is planning to change Vaux for them; they are changing the school to get grant money, because the project towers are coming down, and because there's money to be made in taking over schools.
This is hard to deal with. My life revolves around my students and to everyone "higher up" than me acts like that's not enough. It's not enough to love my kids, to create a safe environment for them, encourage them, advocate for them, and actually make them learn for ONCE in their lives. It's depressing.
I can see myself having to stand aside and watch as my beautiful, precious students are left behind.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Today Was a Good Day
I had to write an essay for my ED526A class about something that happened in school this week. Here's what I wrote:
I’m glad that you asked me to write about something that happened in school this week. Today I had an awesome experience with my students. In general, my 5th period class is a piece of work. My students are all sorts of adorable and funny and endearing, but they don’t know how to behave to save their lives. I end that class most days thinking that “teaching” is a pretty strong word to use for what happens in room 423.
One of the main problems I have with my 5th period—apart from it being a class of ADD/ADHD students right after lunch—is that it’s hard to find that spark in them. They’ll sit in class and (sometimes) pretend to care about what I’m saying, but they don’t relate the curriculum to their lives. But today I got to see my students become mentally and emotionally involved in my lesson!
The other day I bought the documentary Invisible Children, mostly because I’m a documentary nerd, but also in the hopes that my children would be captivated by the story. Watching the movie with my students was my favorite class moment of the year. They originally were excited to watch it because it had kids holding AK-47’s, and they originally thought it was a movie about Haiti, and they originally thought that was all there was to it. As the movie continued I watched my room grow silent, I watched my students move to the front to see clearly, I watched my students hush each other and warn one student not to laugh at the images, and I watched my usually rowdy students become focused and somber. Throughout the movie they made comments about it making them sad and making their stomachs hurt. One student asked me why we didn’t bring the children from Uganda to America. Another asked me why we weren’t giving Uganda money if we were giving it to Haiti. Another said that he thought every student at Vaux should have to see it.
Today I was really proud of my students for sitting still, paying attention and, overall, acting like normal human beings. But what I was really proud of was that they stepped away from their own lives to learn about other people in another place. I saw them actually want to learn about something. And I saw them articulate what they learned and how it affected them with more ease and power than most (fully literate) academics. Today ruled.
I’m glad that you asked me to write about something that happened in school this week. Today I had an awesome experience with my students. In general, my 5th period class is a piece of work. My students are all sorts of adorable and funny and endearing, but they don’t know how to behave to save their lives. I end that class most days thinking that “teaching” is a pretty strong word to use for what happens in room 423.
One of the main problems I have with my 5th period—apart from it being a class of ADD/ADHD students right after lunch—is that it’s hard to find that spark in them. They’ll sit in class and (sometimes) pretend to care about what I’m saying, but they don’t relate the curriculum to their lives. But today I got to see my students become mentally and emotionally involved in my lesson!
The other day I bought the documentary Invisible Children, mostly because I’m a documentary nerd, but also in the hopes that my children would be captivated by the story. Watching the movie with my students was my favorite class moment of the year. They originally were excited to watch it because it had kids holding AK-47’s, and they originally thought it was a movie about Haiti, and they originally thought that was all there was to it. As the movie continued I watched my room grow silent, I watched my students move to the front to see clearly, I watched my students hush each other and warn one student not to laugh at the images, and I watched my usually rowdy students become focused and somber. Throughout the movie they made comments about it making them sad and making their stomachs hurt. One student asked me why we didn’t bring the children from Uganda to America. Another asked me why we weren’t giving Uganda money if we were giving it to Haiti. Another said that he thought every student at Vaux should have to see it.
Today I was really proud of my students for sitting still, paying attention and, overall, acting like normal human beings. But what I was really proud of was that they stepped away from their own lives to learn about other people in another place. I saw them actually want to learn about something. And I saw them articulate what they learned and how it affected them with more ease and power than most (fully literate) academics. Today ruled.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Here's are conversations I've had with students:
Montez: Ms. Lawson they talkin' 'bout Ritalin!
Ms. Lawson: Okay...
Montez: I take dem jawns!
Ms. Lawson: Okay...
Montez: I take dem red ones with the little bumps!!! I take dem red jawns!!!
Then Montez ran around the room.
Ivory: You gonna spend all that money on a cruise?
Ms. Lawson: I guess so. I like spending my money to see new places.
Jamal: Then give me your money and come tour my house! We got one of them futon beds!
Nigeria: Ms. Lawson! I'm going to see that new Michael Jackson movie!
Ms. Lawson: That sounds fun.
Nigeria: I love Michael Jackson!
Khalil: Yeah, you look like one them Thriller joints.
Montez: Ms. Lawson they talkin' 'bout Ritalin!
Ms. Lawson: Okay...
Montez: I take dem jawns!
Ms. Lawson: Okay...
Montez: I take dem red ones with the little bumps!!! I take dem red jawns!!!
Then Montez ran around the room.
Ivory: You gonna spend all that money on a cruise?
Ms. Lawson: I guess so. I like spending my money to see new places.
Jamal: Then give me your money and come tour my house! We got one of them futon beds!
Nigeria: Ms. Lawson! I'm going to see that new Michael Jackson movie!
Ms. Lawson: That sounds fun.
Nigeria: I love Michael Jackson!
Khalil: Yeah, you look like one them Thriller joints.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Friday, October 9, 2009
My students are writing autobiographies. Here's one:
My name is ******* ********. I live in phila all my life. I’m in love with my baby dad he is the one that I can talk to when I’m down. My dad was not always in my life he was traveling all the time when I was 3 and my sister was 1 that wit my mom told me and my sister and then he came when I was 15teen and my sister was 12. He is going out of my life and my sister life like it’s a game but now I know wit was going on with that. Sometime I feel like he don’t love us because he is always comeing in and out our life like I said before he think it’s a game who don’t need a dad in they life. I need to know is that’s y I’m haven a baby because I look for love from man. When I need it from him but it look like he don’t gave a fuck. So all this time we was a game to him. He is going now and I’m 16teen about to be 17teen and my sister is 14teen now. I’m about to have a lil one soon by the love of my life it’s a boy that wit I need in my life.
Dang.
My name is ******* ********. I live in phila all my life. I’m in love with my baby dad he is the one that I can talk to when I’m down. My dad was not always in my life he was traveling all the time when I was 3 and my sister was 1 that wit my mom told me and my sister and then he came when I was 15teen and my sister was 12. He is going out of my life and my sister life like it’s a game but now I know wit was going on with that. Sometime I feel like he don’t love us because he is always comeing in and out our life like I said before he think it’s a game who don’t need a dad in they life. I need to know is that’s y I’m haven a baby because I look for love from man. When I need it from him but it look like he don’t gave a fuck. So all this time we was a game to him. He is going now and I’m 16teen about to be 17teen and my sister is 14teen now. I’m about to have a lil one soon by the love of my life it’s a boy that wit I need in my life.
Dang.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
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